2013....since this could be the only post I write here this year, LOL

Its yet again been some time since I have posted anything I use to be made fun of for posting my life, but it was truly a way to share the love of life, my life I use to have, the marriage I loved, my beautiful children, then it was all taken away from me in one HUGE swoop it seemed, Life can change in a heart beat, mine well the blame lay on me and thats ok, Ill take it, Im strong enough I have proven that to myself over the last 3 years, I cant obviously take A LOT......I wish one day others will be strong enough to take their own faults back and give my shoulders a rest. We make mistakes we let them spiral out of control, relationships that have one or two things missing one day can have many things missing, the longer you go about your days and let those missing things build, they become like pipes with calcium build up on them, and a plumber standing there making matters worse. I fought I worked harder I carried heavy loads until I couldnt do it any longer, sadly what I chose to help me ended up destroying my presonality and ability to care about carrying anything any longer. You let others take over and control you and you run in circles forgetting who you are and what your purpose had ever been. I can leave a list of people that contributed to that tornado but why bother, no one cares anymore, Sad thing is, I do, tremendously. My life is forever changed, many are hurting thanks to my part, not just their own part and I cant fix it for them, I can hardly fix it for myself. I have life on track with GOD first and for most, that was a must. I am in HIS will now and that is an amazing feeling. I know when I feel best and in the right place, now if they other parts of life would just find their way in to healing, this life could actually be incredibly amazing.....so Chapter 2, Part 2, Take 2.....whatever it is, I got on my mark I was ready and Im gone........the past is written here, feel free to read it all, I loved it, I cherished it and I lost it, within the blink of an eye. Sadness followed, now blessings fill the spaces that were battered and bruised.
So whats next, well thats up to God, I listen as He guides. No one can take the place of  certain someones in my past and present, they are there forever. I shall forever cherish my times, my memories and the gifts I have been given in this journey...WOW what a journey, I wish many could understand my thoughts and feelings, to live in my shoes for one moment in time. There are some who think they know me, my thoughts, my walk, my hurts, my motives, but kids.....You have NOOOOOOOOO idea what goes on in this head of mine or what I have walked through in My life with MY kids, my past or present is taken, Get your own and make it amazing, thats what Im doing as best as I can. Love peace joy, let no other steal it from you EVER.