Keep your Fork

There was a woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal Illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things "in order", she contacted her pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes. She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in. The woman also requested to be buried with her favorite Bible. Everything was in order and the pastor was preparing to leave when the woman suddenly remembered something very important to her. "There's one more thing," she said excitedly. "What's that?" came the pastor's reply. "This is very important," the woman continued. " I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand."
The pastor stood looking at the woman, not knowing quite what to say. "That surprises you, doesn't it?" the woman asked. "Well, to be honest, I'm puzzled by the request," said the pastor. The woman explained. "In all my years of attending church socials and potluck dinners, I alwaysremember that when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, 'Keep your fork'. It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming...like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance! So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand and I want them to wonder 'What's with the fork?'. Then I want you to tell them: "Keep your fork....the best is yet to come". The pastor's eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the woman goodbye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her before her death. But he also knew that the woman had a better grasp of heaven than he did. She KNEW that something better was coming.
At the funeral people were walking by the woman's casket and they saw the pretty dress she was wearing and her favorite Bible and the fork placed in her right hand. Over and over, the pastor heard the question "What's with the fork?" And over and over he smiled. During his message, the pastor told the people of the conversation he had with the woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and about what it symbolized to her. The pastor told the people how he could not stop thinking about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop thinking about it either. He was right. So the next time you reach down for your fork, let it remind you oh so gently, that the best is yet to come

Hebrews 4:16, "Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."

a new friend

well I have been meaning to type about my new friend, Lonnie.
Brad and Lonnie were the best of friends in highschool, I have heard many stories, funny how our spouses have a life before us. After all this time of Brad and I being together its even funnier to hear stories about his past. In my eyes our lives began when we met one another and the rest of it is from a life lived so many years ago. I like to hear about his times in his past and how he was, most of it not too far off from the person Brad is today, you can see through some of the chaos that he was still that person I love today under all that teenage "stuff" we all experience.
I met Lonnie when Brad and I were planning our wedding and for a short period of time after we wed. Then as fast as we welcomed Lonnie in to our lives he was out of our lives.
Recently we found him on the infamous Facebook. I decided to type him a Hello message and see if he would accept our online friendship. He did of course and it was the start of restoring a friendship with Brad from long ago and new friendship for myself. Those of you that know me know how much I cherish good friendships. I have had great conversations with Lonnie and have enjoyed getting to know this person that Brad spoke of so often.
I have also learned that through a series of events Lonnie's life as changed dramatically and he is on a path of healing. Brad and I hope we can be a part of that healing with him. To see him turn his life into what he wants it to be, and more so for what God intends it to be.
He is an amazing person with so much to offer this world. Yesterday evening while I was working Lonnie spent time with Brad. I have to add because you can all possibly relate to the thoughts Brad has had of "how boring my life is, I work and hang with my family, why would this guy want to hang with me?"
I have told him that he is a great person that many want to hang out with.
These are my thoughts, right now he and Lonnie are going through the ritual of what have you been doing and remember when stories.
A renewed friendship has to go through all of those steps so that a "new" friendship can emerge and develop. It needs time to catch up to the lives we all live today.
Friday night Lonnie came by and arrived a few moments before Brad did and we were inside talking, Brad came in and he lit up, a smile on his face that was so wonderful for me to see.
Brad has talked so much these last few weeks on how he feels like he is losing who he is to the seriousness of the world around him. He is an amazing man with so much compassion for what goes on around him. I try to help him by reminding him of the great person he is, the gifts God has given him and what direction he is taking his work in. God will reward him and guide him and that he is still Brad, the man I love and respect with that amazing sense of humor fully intact.
As much as I think we can support his new/old friend I think Brad will get that support back and in time that friendship will move past the old times and new memories will develop.
Last night Lonnie mentioned he was going to church in the morning and I was proud to hear him say this but didn't think anything past that. This morning I woke with the thought that I too wanted to attend church and that I should call him. I felt moved to call him, knowing Brad would be ok with it, I made the call. I am glad I did. I met Lonnie at a church he wanted to try and he was going alone and I know all too well that feeling of attending on your own, and for a first timer that is even harder. So I met him and we went. The service was good, but it was not my church it was no "Church on the rock". I love my church and every once in a while it is on the blah side, but more times than not I am so moved when I am there. I walk out feeling a breath of fresh air, renewed. Today I felt good that I went, good that I had a friend to go with, we even had matching outfits on which we both laughed about. I have told him he is my male Robbie. So you know now that I am really enjoying my friendship with him, and due to him being a male it is easier that he is Brad's friend and that he trusts him. This friendship would go no where if that was not the case. I am the girl that has the attitude that no one compares to my daddy or my husband so I am totally comfortable with male friendships.
Point is that today , this morning was a wonderful gift and I felt I was doing a great thing for my new friend and for myself. He felt the same as I about this church and asked on the way out " so your church next week". Well I am so excited to share COTR with him and hope now that it is an amazing service that will bless him and he will want to return again with me. It will be nice to sit next a companion in Christ and receive God.
Today was about worshiping, experiencing, praising God. Reminding us its ok to praise God in how you feel and see fit, there are no rules. God just wants to hear our voices, no matter what we think we sound like, It is sweetness to his ears. If we want to pray to him, its not how we say it or what we say. Its that we believe in his ability to hear us through voice or thought and we are doing so. We can praise him in many ways and should always remember to do so. He gave his son for us and he loves us more than we can ever comprehend. Some things I wrote down in church today, which my notes were not as full as when I attend COTR but all the same I took some things away with me. In my eyes that is the point, to get something from church that will make you think, motivate you in one way or another, one song was moving to me, it was up beat and made me want to praise.
my notes read as follows
Worship lifts our hearts from worldly problems
love your Lord with all your heart and soul
Dont worship the song , band or pastor. Let the song lead you to worship God
it is not something to us or for us but by us
we are the performers and God is the audience
celebration of praise, praise in the manner that is fitting to you, hands lifted, voices lifted, eyes lifted whatever it may be, it should be to yours.
and the band sure is sneaky!, oh wait that was a note to Lonnie, HA
we were praying and it was all of 30 or so seconds, we opened our eyes and the band was in place, not a sound had been made while they moved back in to position.
:) it just hit me as "boy they are sneaky" Lonnie wondered how deep in prayer we had been :)
So that is my new friend and a wonderful friend that I pray for and have such hope for in his future, his life and as a part of my family's life. God blesses us with situations and people for a reason, embrace it and pray about it and know that God is behind everything.
Brad says maybe he will go next time, I sure hope so!

I will do it later mom

What is it with this boy of mine. He just wants love, and not to be questioned, pushed, motivated, nothing else from me. He is driving me nuts. Brenden you need to get that stuff together, "I gotta go mom I will do it later" But later I wont be able to watch and control it!!! there is the honesty in my mothering skills. But there is So much he has going on this week in school, the week before spring break and he just shuts down, more headaches for him, pain in the ass for me. He has tests that he just wants to breeze through, he is not prepared for, spelling test that he has not studied for. Thespelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">freakin test is tomorrow along with one or two other tests.>GRRRRRRRRRRR<, will I survive this child and think I did enough or let go of the blame if . Nope nothing will be wrong, he will be fine. I just stop myself and say, this is who he is and he has chosen. One day he may go back and and say "Oh I could have listened to my mom and done more with what I was given, but look, I turned out just fine" this he may be saying to his therapist while trying to over come all the lectures and bitching!!!!!!!!!!!!! I pray that my son is moving down>life's path that God intendeds for him, Heavenly Father bless him as you have done so already in his life. You breathed life in to him and gave him life to corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">fulfill a purpose and I know that purpose is not to drive his momma id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">loony! I thank you for him and all his wonderful ways. id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">Stubbornness, sensitivity, humor, ego, determination (though it is not being put to use in the areas that I want it to be used in). I know you love him and he is learning about you. Let him continue to grow in your image. Devin, we will talk about later!!!!!!!!!!!

Luck of the Irish

Surely the term "The luck of the Irish" originated from the fact that despite hundreds of years of prosecutuion by the British, land grabs by the British, occupation by the British, the very fact that Ireland still exists is kind of "Luck" in itself.

Irish people have come through such overwhelming adversity and have come out on top and kicking! It must be luck... or true perseverance.

Murphy's Law:
Nothing is as easy as it looks.
Everything takes longer than you expect.
And if anything can go wrong,
It will at the worst possible moment.


May you have:
A world of wishes at your command
God and his angels close at hand
Friends and family their love impart,
And Irish blessings in you heart.


May you always have
Walls for the winds,
A roof for the rain,
Tea beside the fire,
Laughter to cheer you,
Those you love near you,
And all your heart might desire!
Irish Blessing


Coslorga Footprints
Some people come into our lives and quickly go...
Some people stay awhile...
And leave footprints on our hearts...
And we are never, ever the same
As you slide down the banister of life, May the splinters never point in the wrong direction! Irish Blessing

Welcome Spring

there is nothing like welcoming a beautiful spring day, the birds outside chirping, flowers budding on trees, the Easter Lillies ready to stretch open and welcome the warmth of the sun.

and some asshole digging up my mulch

Deep Thoughts

we are all in this energy flow together, what distinguishes us from one another?
the differences is your perspective.

Time of your life

was sitting here messing with my music for this site and wish I could add music to facebook, whats up with that, I need to be entertained a bit more there, I would maybe hang out longer. Anyways, I got to a song that I played for a friend that passed away, over a year ago now. WOW to think of those friends that I have lost, as I approach the age of when their lives ended it is just amazing to me to think that is all they got, so fast. But God knows when it is right to come home so its so hard to truly question why? So I was at Danielle's today and we were doing hair and "When I get were I'm going" came on, that was one of the songs I used in the DVD memorial I made for Joe's (her brother in law) memorial service. It is such an honor for me to do that for others, memorials are just as important to me as doing one for an anniversary, birthday or simply sharing photos with my dad. I add music and slide show of photos set to music. I LOVE IT. But I heard this song and none of us said a world but I know we were all thinking it. Then tonight the song "Time of your life" played and I was like ok Joe, we are thinking of you and you are dearly missed.
I never got to make a dvd for my friend Cindy when she passed, as I was not yet making them period, but now I would have loved to have made one. She too was special.. But actually someone had one, it was hard to watch. Many of us that were close to her went through that time with her and we loved her so much. But I ended up writing a poem and getting bracelets for a dear friend of hers that she hoped I would be in contact with, which never came to pass.
So anyway thats what I am doing right now, thinking of my dear friends that have stepped into the next phase of their souls journey, The beauty, joy and most of all peace.
Words to the songs that leave a lasting message about those that have passed on
My picks


I can only imagine
when I get where Im goin
Time of your life

oh the things kids can say

Brad came in dressed and I said where are we going, or you going? His brother is coming over with Gavin to play as I am here in a robe and wet hair I guess I better go get myself prepared. Well Devin I can hear behind me and thinking nothing of it as he opens the door goes outside and rings the door bell. He does this often.
But Brad says "Devin get your naked ass in here" Well he is butt ass nakie. So Devin says " I Fart, I go out and fart" The word fart and Brad usually end up in laughter, he reverts to a child when you say that word, funny stuff. Devin seems to have picked it up somewhere he likes to talk about it from time to time. If you are in going potty he will walk up and stand there "You fart?" No Devin I didnt, did you? "No I not fart"
A bit more info than needs to be shared, but you cant help but to love some of the things that come from these kids mouths.
Brenden told me the other day as Brad was spouting off funny one liners, our Mike Brady impressions that we love to make up one liners too, anyway Brenden says " When you are feeling down, Climb a tree" OMG he has his dads humor, that to me is a blessing.

I dont wanna grow up , I'm a toys r us kid

Well Robbie you and I will talk on this for hours I am sure. But here is my thing as I say to Brad, HOW do you stop drinking? (willpower and determination)
I mean I have before and I don't have a problem with not drinking. I then would make less of a fool of myself and maybe have a better chance at health. Two weeks ago I said no more drinking.(I have drank 3 times since, can you say LOSER!)
I can still be fun! The alcohol just exaggerates my silliness. Yea I know that is what it does for most. It exaggerates how much of a jerk, crab, funny, sad a person is. I think for me, I just get more extroverted, louder. I show off more, which is annoying to me. These days I don't need more in my life. I had a full weekend of drinking activities for which I am not proud of. It is a bit of a hypocritical thing of me to drink, when I tell my son how much we need to take care of ourselves and be aware of our bodies and how they speak to us and I just go ignoring my own damn good advice once again. Why I rebel so much is just lost on me at times.
Brad and I got to go out last night to see a friend of his from the past, well it was a reunion and Brad just really wanted to go to see him. I think he had fun seeing some others too. I had my friend and her husband meet up so I could let Brad do his own thing and not feel strange with me sitting there watching him. That would suck. Besides I pick on Brad a bit and I hate that and didnt want to do any of that with his peeps.
Night ended early, but later than we planned and we headed to our house with two friends of his and played pool, the ride home I was not pleased with myself for drinking at all. Knowing I was not drunk but had been sitting in a bar, ordering up drinks. Atleast this go around I got water and food too. So at home I didnt drink and was fine, just tired and boy am I the fun one when I am tired. LOL YAWN!!!!
Well we played pool and had snacks and it was the environment that I like to be in, at home where I am not spending money, relaxed, we can talk, hear, goof with one another. So I DUNNO! I told Brad I need to follow through with all theses ideas and wants I have for myself and my life and stop being such a fool. Its time to grow up and get a clue. My thoughts are to be an inspiration to someone else, to live life to the fullest with in reason. To know I can be just as fun without drinking, and bars are so overrated, but going out to eat with friends and having fun is a must.
I need to plan more of those, how nice to get out and how easy to have Brenden watch Devin for a couple of hours so we can do the dinner thing. We spent all this time building our basement and it should be used for entertaining rather than going out to the bar and having $4 beers. That is just ridiculous.
SOOOOO my thoughts are to plan a once a month dinner outing with a friend, or couples or just the guys, just the ladies. We all need to get out and socialize. Have some fun without it getting anyone in to trouble. We are all older and need to remember that. Keep our shit in line. As I am out there being a fool thinking, Man I am older than most of those cute things that have a right to be out drunk and acting like fools. Its in their age to do that, I am already done that. I want to be a grown up now. DID I REALLY JUST SAY THAT!!!!!!

Todays Thought

It is of great value for you to give your conscious attention to what you specifically want, otherwise you can be swept up by the influence of that which surrounds you. You are bombarded by the stimulation of thought. And so, unless you are setting forth the thought that is important to you, you can be stimulated by another's thought that may or may not be important to you.

Support your own thoughts and wants, rather than false ideas from someone else, Know what you want.

morning funny

This child simply cracks me up, I am goofing this morning on the computer, whats new, and I so need to get out of here and find a black table cloth for my Scentsy show tonight. Oh in due time my dear friends, I will be on the road running wild and free. But for now I am laughing at Heavy D, he got out his puff balls/pom poms, you know those fluffy crafty ball things. might I mention HE LOVES TO COOK, so he comes in grabs bowls and spoons, leaves, comes back for bags and paper bags, soon he is back for his muffin tins only to return AGAIN for muffin cups. Soon he is back for his completed project, pom poms in cups in the muffin tin to the oven ,he needs to cook. OF COURSE I took photos, he is now trying to take them in and out of a cold over with his whoobie that acts as his oven mit. I tried to get up to get something by the stove, he said, "SIT SIT, I COOKING"
LOVE THIS CHILD, of course as I am typing this he got out some yankee tarts and said mmmmmmmmmmmm, smell this one! oh yea I still have yankee, love that company too!!!!!

stop being in the middle

I have to stop being in the middle of everyones stuff, feelings, fights, issues, decisions. I want to help and be supportive, it seems that most of the time that ends up taking more from and out of me than the person it is about.
So I will work on still caring and having compation but knowing that I may not actually be able to change the world, or atleast some people. Its ok to have my friends as my family to love and support who will do the same for me.
I respect my family and love them deeply, but fixing them is not my "job".
I can listen and pray for them, let God do the fixin here.

Where have I been

I am home from work and it was a busy night, I hate when I get that busy. I feel like I rush through all that I have to do, then people come back from the bathroom, is this side a little bit longer, well probably, sit back down. I don't know why it would be I mean I am only squeezing my butt between the counter and this chair in less than conducive light to give you a beautiful haircut. Are my brows even see this little hair here, well sure let me tweeze it, I didn't see that when you were laying your head back in the shadows of this corner. The one thing I hate about doing hair outside of a salon, being rushed and not having the proper setting to do the best job I know I am capable of doing. I have to remind myself to slow down and take the time that each person deserves. But I throw in a freebie and they forgive me, well enough that they call me back for more. Most people I have been doing for years, so I must be doing something they like, and if they leave they do end up coming back at one point or another. So forgive me to all the clients that had a longer side, a missed section in the foiling or a brow that was not as thin as the other.
Tomorrow I have my first "REAL" Scentsy show with my girlfriend Becky next door(the first show I turned in from outside orders I got myself, it was a decent order and it gave me the chance to sit with Robbie and put them in the computer and do that whole process or order, receive and deliver), late this afternoon it took me some time and a babysitting favor from Brenden to get my paper work and supplies ready for it. Devin did not nap today so I was bumming a little bit, well until my prince Brenden saved me.
I had a basket of testers out across the street that I had to get back so my clients tonight could play, they liked a few and I am sure will order in the future, why is it I feel odd to take a second thing for others to hand over their money to me for? They are receiving a service or products from me and its all at a wonderful price, but I feel at times like I am pan handling, LOL at myself.
Soooo tomorrow I have another park play date with my sister in law, my beautiful mother in law needs her hairs did, I need to get a hold of her. I need to hit a store for a rotisserie chicken to use the meat for the buffalo wing dip that Becky asked me to bring to the party. Is that odd, I am working it and bringing a dish. Well I can say that Becky would do it for me so I am truly happy to do it, besides getting to eat it, YUM! I also prefer to buy a cooked chicken and strip it of its meat rather than buy chicken from a can, just doesn't sit well with me in thought. I will eat it like that and its fine, but I am funny about food and feel better knowing its a fresh kill, HA, I mean fresh cooked chicken. Oh and I need to get those testers back to the other neighbor for her gathering she is having with family and friends tomorrow night.
Saturday I am going to Moms to work for a bit and drop postage and postcards to one of my besties Danielle for her upcoming Scentsy party. Then Sunday I am having a Launch party for my new career with Scentsy, a nice way to introduce the product to those I have yet to share all these wonderful scents with. I am so in love with this stuff and love to see peoples reactions to the different scents. Amazing how different we all feel about smells.
Devin and I both have allergies issues right now thanks to this Missouri weather. Brad has it slightly and Brenden started complaining this evening of a scratchy throat. I am going to try Claritin D tomorrow, the regular is just not doing it for us. I really need to get the acupuncture to clear my sensitivity to it all. Whatever it all is that attacks my sinus'.
Well I have been typing long enough, I am pooped from a long day and need to get some rest. I hope to wake early to finish reading "The Shack" you were right Robbie, what a wonderful book. I was doing well reading it, then got busy and have not been able to pick it up in a day and a half. I will make it a point to some how some way finish it tomorrow.
Hope all is well and everyone has a beautiful, blessed Friday.
Peace

Parents often think that they are here to guide the little ones. When - in reality - the little ones come forth with clarity to guide you.